I feel like my mind has been a bit all over the place the past week or so. Can anyone else relate? I am not sure if it is due to the transitions that are going on at home for my family with my youngest having her first official week of in-school instruction, or if it's the change of season, or the possibility of finally being able to re-open my practice in the next few months.... Okay so now that I see it in writing, I realize why I really am all over the place!! It's hilarious that we question ourselves(and our sanity) when the answers are right in front of us- if we pay close enough attention to it.
I wanted to touch on something that is appropriate for it being about one year since the pandemic has been upon us here in the US. I have been listening and reading a lot about giving yourself permission to grieve your loss and allowing others to do the same. Not everything is fixable or needs to be fixed right away, which can be really hard for me. More often than not, I am the friend or family member that is good at listening but then always wants to give advice to help or fix whatever problem lies ahead. I am a middle child (peacekeeper) and an Enneagram 2 (The Helper) so this is not surprising. (If you haven't done it yet, I highly recommend taking the test to see what your Enneagram is.) It literally pains me to hear or see someone I love struggling without trying to make them feel better or help then work through it, instead of just listening.
There has been so much loss over the past year- loss of lives, jobs, independence, time with friends and families, and our everyday lives. Some losses are bigger than others but they are losses, nonetheless. This is where giving yourself permission to grieve comes in. I have lost things, but I have said so many times over the past year, "Oh, but it could always be worse." Yes, this is true. I can always be worse, but that doesn't mean that what you are grieving is not important and doesn't deserve the recognition, time and attention. If it is not tended to, it will come back around in ways you would never expect.
Giving yourself permission to be sad and angry is so important and I am realizing that there have been times throughout my life that I haven't let myself really feel this way. In my head, I always think, "What do I really have to complain about?! I am so much luckier than most!" Well, guess what- it's okay to complain. It is okay for feel sorry for yourself for whatever situation you are going through- no matter how big or small you think it is.
So no matter what your loss has been since the pandemic started, give yourself permission to feel all the feelings you have about it. You need to. I know I do!!!
"Grief is not a disorder, a disease or a sign of weakness. It is an emotional, physical and spiritual necessity, the price you pay for love.The only cure for grief is to grieve."
As always, thank you for reading.